Two steps forward, one step back...

Why is it that when I've made progress in my ever evolving life, I must (MUST!) find some way to push back? When I feel the satisfaction of success my evil twin emerges and begins thinking she's the one in control. I know in my head, and mostly feel in my heart, that I'm NOT in control - that someone/something more powerful than a mere human is in charge, but I want to grab that illusion of control like an angry two year old and say "I can do it myself!". God/Goddess, Higher Power, please help me to remember that I am a tool for Your work here on earth and that I'm blessed with a Life Purpose that I want to live every day. I'm here to heal and communicate with love. My purpose applies to myself as well as others - instead of being angry with my two year old, I need to embrace her and gently nurture her when she wants to be in control of things. I thank God every day that I'm NOT in control because my life is chaos during the times when I just THINK I'm in control - imagine what havoc I could create if it was truly my will --- ooooooooo, scary thought, huh? You have no idea...